Quit Screwing Yourself

Published by BR365admin on

Inspirational quotes and positive affirmations are great and can work wonders in terms of creating motivation, but at the end of the day, hearing it straight up is what most, if not all people need in order to make sustainable change in their life.

I came across a Jordan Peterson video last week that was head lined ‘Stop being pathetic’. Simple. And straight to the point.

And this got me thinking. So often, we and I included from time to time, try to ease the pain and soften the blow for our friends, acquaintances, family and ourselves. But this doesn’t help them or us.

This sort of soft encouragement rarely creates long term change and fulfillment in anyone’s lives, so what’s the benefit? Instead it creates a whole bunch of rah rah, but rarely any sustainable action to back it up. And I realized I need to deliver a more direct, intense and “gritty” writing style to match how I speak in person.

Realistically I’m the guy who stood up at GoodLife sales launch, and told the room of 40 fitness advisors, that if you don’t sell at least 20% personal training starter packages to new members, you don’t take pride in what you do. I was delivering company high numbers in this regard at 75% so I could say it and I had real value to my point. But I basically told ¾ of the room that they don’t take pride in who they are, or what they do.

Rude? I don’t think so nor care. I was making a point. Like I will be making just as an assertive point in this article.

“QUIT SCREWING YOURSELF”

By: Brandon Rynka

I haven’t gone through life not being a screw up. I’ve screwed myself plenty as a youth. But when I do fail, when I do screw myself over, because of my haughtiness, impatience, or lack of education, I stop and analyze how not to do it again. I take the feeling of this fucking sucks, and I come up with a plan to make my next venture great and successful and I don’t stop until my life in ALL areas are at a high standard.

Let’s be real, we all have shit going on. But why can 1 person do so well with the same resources, same opportunity, same ability to network, same socioeconomic status, same community, and same environment while others constantly struggle to get by?

It isn’t a lack of resources, time, or anybody else’s fault. It falls on your shoulders. Every. Single. Time.

If you’re a fuck up, you fucked up.

I have a hard time empathizing with people who don’t succeed in life, yet bitch, complain or desperately want to feel better about their position on this planet.

It makes absolutely no sense.

YOU HAVE THE ABILITY TO CHANGE THIS.

I am the guy who genuinely believes you shouldn’t live in a state of sadness. As touchy of a subject as that may be and I understand there is a lot of research and studies being done, I honestly believe there is too much opportunity and freedom in this country to not create a life you are happy with.

If you look at anyone who is in a state of “whoa is me”, i guarantee you they are not following the FULL plan below.

And it’s not rocket science.

THE PLAN

Develop a consistent health plan. Eat foods that are good for you, that make you feel good, and that don’t add to your fatness or lethargy. Everyday do something physically active, that stimulates you, and regulates positive endorphins.

Socialize. Laugh with friends who BUILD you up. Find communities that support healthy productive habits. Learn from others you admire and who excite your mind and force growth. They are not hard to find when you take the time to look.

Work a job you enjoy, that gives you a sense of purpose that includes some form of creativity, autonomy and give back. If you do something for 40 hours a week that you do not enjoy, lacks stimuli and you lack a certain passion about doing, good luck not being depressed. 40 hours a week, doing anything tedious, boring, and uneventful is too many hours to not make you feel like shit.

I respect myself too much to work a job that drains me to go into. I work at a job that I literally could go into every day and not hate. This is serenity. This is peace of mind. This is what we must do.

If you say it’s not that easy, I say bullshit.

Develop a craft. Learn a skill. Work on you as much as you work on your 40 hours at work.

When I hear someone say their life isn’t fantastic, I blame that person.

We all have shit going on. We all have obstacles, but there are solutions to every hurdle. The issue stems from most of us not searching deep enough for the answer. It’s not the circumstance that assists our sadness but how we deal with the circumstance.

How much have you actually invested in yourself? Answer this genuinely and you’ll be shocked.

If I asked someone who is always stressed out, anxious and lacks self-confidence, how many books they’ve read on inner peace, the art of fulfillment and dealing with stress, they wouldn’t be able to count 2-3 let alone 10-15.

This tells me that they haven’t even given themselves a shot to succeed.

If anything, if you are struggling with something to such a high degree that it majorly affects your quality of life, you should become an expert in that field so you can rectify the issue, and eliminate the burden that causes so much pain and suffering.

There are endless avenues to get help from and to find solutions and help navigate through life with.

START BY GETTING A F’N LIBRARY CARD

It’s FREE for gosh sakes! It’s full of endless information designed to improve your damn life. Yet, we all have visas, MasterCard’s, and gift cards that cost money and give us no long term gratification, and I bet very few of us have that FREE library card which is built around helping us become improved, healthier, better-rounded individuals.

The time we spend bitching, which makes our life in no way better, could be spent educating ourselves on how to improve that particular situation.

We use the excuse we’re too busy or have no time. Bullshit you don’t have time. You just choose to value sleeping 8 hours, going on social media, and thinking sad thoughts, over being productive and developing more grit.

Actually break it down for a second; if every time we felt worried, we read a passage on how to deal with worry, we would become experts in that subject. Instead we let it overwhelm us and make our problems worse. Again, it’s not rocket science.

‘Closing Passage’

Structure your damn life.

Eliminate the habits that make you feel like shit.

Remove negative people: People whose lives are draining and make you feel worse about yourself after speaking to them.

Join clubs, teams, groups, communities, organizations that give you a productive avenue to feel better about yourself.

Give back. For god sake, give back to the community. Focus on other people’s problems and help them. In turn for all you selfish people out there, it will help you. This sort of altruistic behavior builds internal happiness, and peace.

It’s not difficult. We just make it difficult by succumbing to the daily bullshit of everyday life. We constantly do things that drain our fulfillment and leave us lacking the energy or motivation to actually improve our lives.

Accept this responsibility immediately and fix your life.

Reach out to people, ask for help, and change your fucking life!

You cannot completely rectify what has come and gone. So it’s your responsibility to deal with anything we lack control over from the past that might have hurt us, scarred us or drained us, in a way that builds us up, rather than tears us down.

I’m writing this in a fairly aggressive manner, because I need to share with you the simplicity in which we constantly screw ourselves over.

Life doesn’t have to be as hard as we make it.
If your feeling lost, sad, hurt, betrayed, unfulfilled, I can help. And there are hundreds of resources to help you as well.

Just like everyone else, I have been neglected, looked over, isolated, rejected and insulted in the past but I don’t get sad for long because I have programmed myself to avoid that weak state of mind.

The difference is that I have constantly searched for ways to never be stuck in that negative state: A state of self-pity and angst.

I read, listen, educate, and take action on making my life better EVERY SINGLE DAY. I use knowledge as an asset rather than a hindrance or liability.

Re-think the question

The next time you start asking, “why me?” Ask yourself, “what have I done to fuck myself over? What haven’t I done, and more importantly, what can I do to make small improvements today? Right now.”

How can I better my situation on the small scale immediately?

When we do this and stay consistent, life improves rather quickly.

Adopting a victim mentality is a massive reason losers stay losers. Nothing changes, unless you genuinely do.

Staying consistent is the key. As humans, we are royal fuck ups, who constantly shoot ourselves in the foot, oblivious of the long term affect our poor choice in the now has on our future. But once you finally adopt the long term mindset, and appreciate how valuable your daily habits are for your overall quality of life, only then will you begin living a life of peace and fulfillment.

Only then can you rid yourself of your internal evils and demons.

Only then will life finally look up.

This is what it takes.

It won’t be easy.

It won’t be without discomfort, time or uncertainty, but you will learn and see results. Like anything, applying patience and discipline is the key to getting the result you want.

Find a way to improve your life, and stop fucking yourself over.

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